Psychotherapy For Men

Psychotherapy for Men in Falmouth, Cornwall

What I see

Most of the men who come to see me are still functioning. They go to work, they look after people, and from the outside not much looks wrong. What they describe is quieter than that: a tiredness that sleep does not fix, a shorter fuse than they used to have, a sense of standing slightly apart from the people they love.

By the time a man books a first session, he has usually been managing on his own for a long while. Asking for help is rarely the first thing he tries. More often it comes when the things that used to work have stopped working.

What brings men to therapy

Sometimes there is a clear reason. A relationship ends, an injury takes away a sport, burnout can no longer be ignored, or someone close dies. Sometimes it is a pattern he keeps running into at work or at home, which he would rather understand than repeat.

The men I see bring anxiety, low mood, anger, trauma, relationship difficulties and burnout. Many are also living through a change of identity: retiring from sport, becoming a father, or losing a role that told them who they were.

Why talking can be hard

Many men learned early that being capable was how they kept their place with other people. Self reliance, staying steady and getting on with it are real strengths. They are also the very things that make it hard to say out loud what is going on inside.

So the difficulty tends to come out sideways, as irritability, withdrawal, longer hours or a few more drinks. None of that is a character flaw. It is usually a way of coping that made sense once and now costs more than it gives.

What therapy with me is like

I work in relational Transactional Analysis. In plain terms, I am interested in what your early relationships taught you about what was safe to feel and to need, and in how those lessons still shape the way you live and relate now.

Sessions are a conversation between two adults. I will not analyse you from a distance or hand you a list of tips. Some weeks we stay with what is happening at work or at home. Other weeks the past turns up in the present, and we follow it.

Many men arrive wanting something practical, and that is fair. In my experience the practical changes tend to come once the pattern underneath begins to make sense.

You do not need to know what to say, and you do not need to arrive convinced. Scepticism is welcome in the room.

The pressures men carry

I also pay attention to what men were told a man should be, at home, at school and in sport, and to how that still shapes what they allow themselves to feel. We look at it together, without blame, to see where it is still running things.

Next steps

The first step is a 30 minute consultation by phone. We talk about what has brought you, what you hope for, and whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation to go further.

If you are considering therapy, or simply wondering whether it might be helpful, I welcome you to send an enquiry through the form on my Fees and Booking page.

carl@innerwarriortherapy.co.uk

Falmouth, Cornwall and online across the UK