Couples Therapy & Relational Needs:
Rebuilding Emotional Connection
By Inner Warrior Therapy – Couples & Men’s Psychotherapy in Falmouth & Online
Do you and your partner keep having the same argument?
Are you struggling to feel truly seen, heard, or valued in your relationship?
Do you feel emotionally distant, even when physically close?
At Inner Warrior Therapy, I help couples rebuild trust and emotional connection through Couples Psychotherapy, both in Falmouth and online across the UK.
A powerful foundation for this work is understanding what psychologist Dr. Richard Erskine identified as the eight core relational needs. Needs that, when unmet, often lead to frustration, miscommunication, and emotional distance.
🧠 What Are Relational Needs in Couples Therapy?
Healthy relationships depend on more than love, they depend on emotional attunement. Erskine’s eight relational needs help us understand why we sometimes feel disconnected in relationships, even when both partners deeply care.
By identifying these needs, couples gain insight into themselves and one another, making therapy more focused, compassionate, and transformative.
💡 Erskine’s 8 Core Relational Needs
Here are the eight emotional needs that form the foundation of fulfilling, secure relationships:
Security
Feeling emotionally safe and protected by your partner.Validation
Having your thoughts and feelings acknowledged as valid and meaningful.Acceptance
Being appreciated for who you are, without pressure to change.Mutuality
Sharing emotional experiences and showing empathy for each other.Self-Definition
Feeling free to express your values, identity, and preferences, without fear of judgment.Impact
Knowing that your words and actions make a difference to your partner.Shared Experience
Engaging in meaningful and connected moments together.Initiative from the Other
Experiencing affection, attention, or care without having to ask for it.
These needs often go unspoken, but they affect everything from communication to intimacy.
💬 Why Understanding These Needs Matters Before Therapy
Couples therapy works best when both partners come with a willingness to explore, not just what’s going wrong, but why.
Here’s how understanding these needs can help before therapy even begins:
✅ Clarify Unmet Needs
Instead of blaming each other, you’ll begin to understand what you’re really longing for.✅ Build a Shared Language
These needs give you a way to talk about emotional experience that’s clear and constructive.✅ Create Space for Empathy
Understanding your partner’s vulnerabilities helps reduce defensiveness and increase compassion.✅ Focus Therapy on What Matters
Sessions become more effective when grounded in what each partner actually needs to feel safe, connected, and loved.✅ Prevent Future Conflict
By addressing needs early, you can stop frustration turning into resentment.
❤️ How Couples Psychotherapy Supports You Both
At Inner Warrior Therapy, I offer a safe, neutral space for both partners to be heard, without blame or judgement. Couples therapy is not about deciding who’s right or wrong. It’s about understanding each other better, and creating new patterns of connection.
Together, we will:
Explore each person’s relational needs
Understand where those needs have been missed or misunderstood
Develop healthier ways of responding to each other emotionally
Build deeper intimacy and stronger communication
Reconnect with shared meaning, purpose, and emotional safety
📍 Couples Therapy in Falmouth or Online
Sessions are held face-to-face at the Wellness Hub in Falmouth, or remotely via secure online therapy for couples across the UK.
Whether you’re navigating a major life transition, recovering from betrayal, or just feel emotionally stuck, therapy offers a space to rebuild your relationship from the inside out.
You don’t have to keep missing each other.
You deserve to feel seen, heard, and emotionally supported.
And change is possible.
👉 Ready to Start Couples Therapy?
If you’re considering couples counselling in Falmouth, Cornwall or are looking for online couples therapy across the UK, I’d be happy to support you.
Let’s work together to explore your relational needs and start rewriting your relationship story.
📧 carl@innerwarriortherapy.co.uk
📞 07307 224924
🌍 innerwarriortherapy.co.uk
